This Side of NH

Loved

2006-05-16T11:46:00.000-05:00

So going through the aftermass of the atomic bomb of what I used to call my room, I came across numerous things that I've lost over the time span of oh....6 years, which includes: my mom's sisscor sharpeners, my prostretch so that I could get rid of my shin splints, a couple of dead mouse bodies (Yuck...no those weren't lost..), one of my bosox hats (w00t), and then a couple boxes of shit that wasn't really missing.

Today I came across a bag full of stuffs from my HS graduation...
2 years 2 in 2 weeks whoosh, whered the time go.

Anyway,

Tons of Congrats grad cards, decided to look over them see what people had to say one last time before I chucked them (I'm trying to stop being a pack rat...I learned that I really don't have room for all this shit...and if Ima gonna move out netime soon, 1/2 this stuff has gotta go neway...). Reading through them, I became a huge pansy. Yes, a pansy. Tears began to fill my pathetic eyes. What is it with me lately, jeeze, becoming a freaking huge ball of emotions. This must stop. Blaming the weather.

I'm a unique person, intellgient, beautiful, etc...haha things that any person that has low self esteem like myself has a hard time beleiving...though I know I'm unique....sometimes...tooooooo unique haha.

I have people who I can count on, who will always be there for me no matter what. My old babysitter, who is now a friend of the family, wow, her card, it killed me, thats where I lost it. Just...ya this was it...

"Katie~
I found this card and had to get it for you. Its perfect that you love smiley faces because you face has always brightened every room you're in. I still remember the little 5 year old girl with the big beautiful smile and the long blonde hair. Now I look at you and see a beautiful woman but you still have the big beautiful smile and the long blonde hair. Time goes by so fast, always remember to keep smiling. We are so proud of you, you have worked hard and we know you'll go far. Always remember you have a lot of people who love you and will always be there for you. If you ever need anything I'm only a phone call or a car ride way. I love you.
Love Julie"

Yeh basically, huge Sally, gi-freaking-normous.

Emotions, go away THANKS.

I guess Ive come to realize that I'm not alone in this world...and this past couple weeks alone have shown me that...Even if I don't keep in touch with all of my friends from high school all the time, or even college for that matter...I know there will be certain ones who, like Julie, will always be there for me. Even if it comes down to bringing over a handle of shitty vodka to make things a little better, or send me stupid sticky fish in the mail, an IM/email calling me a crack baby, or a simple note reminding me of an inside joke, I know that I'll have people to count on..

Its the faith that people have in me that keep me going...

Thanks guys...I love you.

*Katie

Just stuffs, a quick catchup, but not even enough to begin

2006-01-06T03:00:00.000-05:00

So...its kind of been an eternity since I last blogged. A little over a year now. I should probably get back into the habit as I'm more than likely going to be writing a good amount this semester. Don't get me wrong, I love to write. Would rather write a term paper anyday over doing stupid math problems. Wow...last semester was definately...a life changing experience, helping me grow, realize things that I never thought I would find myself admitting. I'm not the big partier I once thought I was. Was most definately a one semester fluke where I partied every weekend. I've also come to learn that I need to not stress out about the stupid stuff that I cannot control. I need to live my life day to day and not try to plan for the future yet. I'm still a kid, still have at least 2 years of undergrad work to be done...and then who knows from there? Switching my major was a huge milestone in my life. No longer a full fledge business major, but now Intergrated Liberal Studies Program, seems to be the direction in which my life is headed. OOOOR picking my nose as my wonderful roomie would like to say hahahha. Communications and Sports Management in one, but not double majoring. Taking both kinds of classes, but will not be graduating with a business degree...which sucks but...whatever... My dream has switched directions, I hope to be a large contribution to the future of the Red Sox somehow, but is that not every Red Sox Fan's dream who is majoring in Sports Mang. or Some businessy thing. Haha oh the amazingness of it all. Well, I just gotta keep living. Keep being myself. Studying hard. But hopefully this semester I'll be able to let lose a little bit, most definately hang out if nothing more. Perhaps I'll learn to get more stuff done during the day, perhaps even days before its due opposed to waiting till the last minute. Maybe I'll even be lucky enough to find love. Hahaha now if thats a dream thats out there, reaching for the stars, I don't know what is. Well anyway, its getting real late, soooo now i must move onwards, perhaps to bed even, YAY.

*Katie

i think i've its all coming together Now

2005-01-04T01:40:00.000-05:00

McD WNEC 13: luke is a loserMcD WNEC 13: etc etc etcSweetDreams8671: okSweetDreams8671: thanks SweetDreams8671: he started talking to me againMcD WNEC 13: oh?McD WNEC 13: what did the ahole say?SweetDreams8671: nothinig much he said sorrySweetDreams8671: and then asked hoew my vacawasMcD WNEC 13: sorry doesnt cut itMcD WNEC 13: laura he spazed for no reasonMcD WNEC 13: he's just gonna walk all over uSweetDreams8671: we'll see but im keeping my options openMcD WNEC 13: . . . . McD WNEC 13: i dont think u should to lukeMcD WNEC 13: laura what ru lookin for in a guy?McD WNEC 13: like honestlyMcD WNEC 13: who do u picture yourself marrying personality wiseSweetDreams8671: wowSweetDreams8671: ummSweetDreams8671: some one whos knows how to make me smileMcD WNEC 13: Luke has been doing nothing but making u frown the past monthSweetDreams8671: whos knows that im a hopeless romantic and trys their hardest to make my dreams come trueSweetDreams8671: aka never gunna happenMcD WNEC 13: aka not lukeMcD WNEC 13: keep goingSweetDreams8671: someone who will always be there when i need a shoulder to cry onMcD WNEC 13: he runs awaySweetDreams8671: and someone who understands that my family comes first in everything i doMcD WNEC 13: luke got pissy when u hung out with us and not him...we're your family tooSweetDreams8671: you are my bestest friend at schoolMcD WNEC 13: thanks :-)SweetDreams8671: and this means a lot to meMcD WNEC 13: awhMcD WNEC 13: its just...luke may know how to make you smile SOMETIMES...and he may seem to know how to be romantic...but if it doesn't add up all the time...and if more of the time you are worrying or not happy with what is happening...then quite frankly that person is not worth ANYTHINGMcD WNEC 13: and laura...yeh he may be cute or whatever and yeh when hes nice hes awesome...but all those other times when you're upset because of HIM...that time shouldn't be spent being upset, frustrated, or sad because he doesn't know how to treat another human beingSweetDreams8671: but maybe this means somethingMcD WNEC 13: it means that u need to start lookin in other places than u usually do for guys...McD WNEC 13: i know im probably the last one u want to look to for information on guys because i have yet to have a relationship...but i think i haven't had a relationship yet becasue everytime that the possibility has come up i've come to realize that the person who i like isn't who i want to be with for the rest of my life, or doesn't hold the same values as me..will treat me like his best friend and not his girlfriend...i dont really even know what im saying lolMcD WNEC 13: maybe u should just not look for right nowMcD WNEC 13: just u knowMcD WNEC 13: concentrate on school workSweetDreams8671: maybe your rightMcD WNEC 13: i mean the first semester i think i spent way too much time LOOKING for a guyMcD WNEC 13: which is why i probably didnt FIND himMcD WNEC 13: we can't find what we dont know what it is we are EXACTLY looking forSweetDreams8671: youll find him when you arnt lookingMcD WNEC 13: yaMcD WNEC 13: and more than likely he'll be your friend firstMcD WNEC 13: thats what happened with my parents...McD WNEC 13: tho the whole thing was weirdMcD WNEC 13: i guess my dad saw my mom walking down the hallway one day and said "im going to marry her" before he even knew her nameMcD WNEC 13: he tried to pursue her romanticallyMcD WNEC 13: but he wouldnt let herMcD WNEC 13: *she wouldnt let himMcD WNEC 13: damn my dislexiaSweetDreams8671: lolSweetDreams8671: i get itMcD WNEC 13: she wanted a friend firstMcD WNEC 13: and they became best friendsMcD WNEC 13: then datedMcD WNEC 13: and now here they areMcD WNEC 13: 21 or 22 years laterMcD WNEC 13: my mom was 19 when she met my dad...McD WNEC 13: which scares me hahaMcD WNEC 13: cause here i am 19 years old..SweetDreams8671: yea my mom met my dad at 18SweetDreams8671: aka why im like wow nowMcD WNEC 13: am i really ready to find the person who im bound to be with for the rest of my life?McD WNEC 13: who knowsMcD WNEC 13: yeh..McD WNEC 13: just dont think about itSweetDreams8671: im there with you on thatMcD WNEC 13: just when u do start to date someoneMcD WNEC 13: its time to start asking yourself if u could see that person meeting your parentsMcD WNEC 13: and being part of your familyMcD WNEC 13: thats why u dateMcD WNEC 13: to find the person u are going to marry
SweetDreams8671: wowSweetDreams8671: im like ahhhhhhMcD WNEC 13: bah im sorry :-\McD WNEC 13: am i just making shit bad?SweetDreams8671: noSweetDreams8671: your making more and more senceMcD WNEC 13: lets just say ive had lots and lots of lectures and ive read plenty of stuff that its actually starting to click as im saying this allSweetDreams8671: wowMcD WNEC 13: yeh so...moral of me running my trap: dont go looking for what you cant find cause you dont know what you're looking for...just look for friendshipSweetDreams8671: alrightySweetDreams8671: soMcD WNEC 13: ?SweetDreams8671: wats up?McD WNEC 13: not too much lolMcD WNEC 13: i really hope i wasnt just being a doucheSweetDreams8671: no of course notSweetDreams8671: puh leasde dont say thatSweetDreams8671: wat you said put things into perspectivSweetDreams8671: eSweetDreams8671: maybe i dont need to be looking for a guy right nowSweetDreams8671: what i need to have my friends close to me and they will be my shouldrs to cry on i dot need a guy to do that for meSweetDreams8671: your just pointing out things ive not wanted to seeMcD WNEC 13: honestly i dont think u need to look for a guy ever...u have a great personality and are beautiful...the right guy will find uSweetDreams8671: im trusting you on this oneMcD WNEC 13: i only speak the truthSweetDreams8671: aww katie i love you

to feel like this has never felt so Good

2004-12-03T21:34:00.000-05:00

Wow how I miss this feeling. The physical workout of just moving side to side. No it wasn't catching, but it was damn close enough. Went up to the HLC with Jamie, Mike, Jim and Kate. Never thought that Mike and Jim would be getting along ever...only an addition to this amazing night. Attempting to run up and down the court with reg. support didn't do me much good...thought I was going to knock myself out hahahaha...so I decided to play goalie instead. To what seemed like everyone's amazement, I was pretty damn good playing goalie. Despite my sickness, I feel like I haven't since my last day of playing softball...wow almost two months ago...I do miss it, but now that my knee isn't giving me any trouble at the moment (knock on wood) I'm going to be going to the HLC as much as possible. I'll probably end up starting the workout for softball...I know that I won't be anywhere near where the softball team is now in physical shape, but I'll be able to catch up with them soon enough...I'll sign up at twisted fitness or something so that I'll be working over break as well :) . Damn I feel good...and other things that only a select few know about...ok a little more than a select few but its a good thing YAY...God I love my door and the people on this floor...and my friends...I can't imagine leaving WNEC if I don't make the team next year... :/ NOT GOING TO THINK ABOUT IT because i will be working my ass off...yeh so anyway...I love people who know how to make me smile and I love making others smile too...The only downside of this night is how I am still sick and how megan is not being very social with me...damnit...

<3>

XXkRmXX

Will the annoyance ever stop

2004-12-02T21:21:00.000-05:00

Ugh I just wish I could not be sick at some of the most crucial times of my life. Oh well...what I am going to do...

One the other hand, this past week was pretty decent...walking to dinner hasn't been that entertaining in a while...Nate...hmmm kind words alround...Miss my Mega and Samma...Jessi and Steph...no words no words...

now its time for this sickling to sleep or something like it...

~~XkrmX~~

2004-11-28T01:24:00.001-05:00

Em, Di, Me before our night out..

2004-11-28T01:24:00.000-05:00

Me and mah Berkshire Babes out for the night at Court Square

the town of the C

2004-11-28T01:18:00.000-05:00

what an interesting night. loved it would redo everything the same all over again. Just being able to hang out with a group of people I haven't seen in months was so relaxing. Not much was said, but then again I don't do well with large groups of people I don't know for whatever reason. Not much to be said other than i love the sound of live music, no matter what it is, and Nate and his band have a lot of potential...can't wait to hear them a couple years down the line.. I miss seeing Eli, Sean, Hartzell and Chase..and of course my lil freshman samma....hmm its like 1:00..am...no wonder I can't write...or maybe this is an experience that cannot really be written about....Sarah is cool as hell and I can't wait to hang out with her more. Its gonna be an awesome Christmas break...even if i won't be seeing much of my WNEC crew...

Until December C-town. . .

2004-11-28T01:16:00.000-05:00

awh me and my froshie samma...ahahaha what a nut imma gonna miss her :(

My questions are always answered

2004-11-26T21:22:00.000-05:00

I remembered why it was that I was so eager to get away from this place, and only 2.5 more days and I will be away from it again. But the question to be answered this time is how long will I be able to keep my sanity for when this time presents itself to me yet again in a few weeks.

It seems that everytime I begin to appreciate what I already had even more, that somehow that second of pure thanks is destroyed by some little action that may or may not have been avoided. Theres no way to hide from it. Now I begin to understand more and more why college is a perfect home away from home for me. Not because I'm expanding my knowledge of the text books, but rather I'm begining to learn more about myself, who I am, and where I want to be years down the line.

I only have my family, friends, and enemies to thank for that.

Always thank your enemies, they got you where you are too...one way or another...

the peacefulness I missed

2004-11-26T17:27:00.000-05:00

Being back home these past couple days has made me appreciate NH more than I ever thought I would. Even today, Black Friday, the busiest shopping day of the year, people were driving at a pace that was not rushed at all. The town which I would have thought to be jam packed with traffic, was less than what I remember as normal for a holiday shopping day. Maybe people in this part of NH aren't in a hurry to get anywhere fast. Just living life as they know it without pushing the limits. On another note, I've never been so appreciative for homemade food. Thankgiving was amazing. Thank god my sister has patience and loves how to cook. She makes amazing pies and I miss them a lot. Despite the fact that I am enjoying home and the peace in this room to myself with nothing more than the sounds of the washing machine, keyboard as I'm typing, and the occasional ring of the phone and barking of the dogs, I still miss my WNEC crew...

B-Unit and Billy Joe Richardsons 4 eva

~Katie R.M.